Dating at SMCM: As Much Fun as the MVA

SMCM is known for its rigorous academic programs, scenic campus, and eclectic, friendly student body.

Come for the academics? The friendly people? The scenery? Yes.

Come looking for love? I wouldn‘t.

No one should be enrolling at a college or university because of the male-to-female ratios or chances for a Must Love Dogs reenactment, but coming to St. Mary’s thinking that one might find someone worth being in a relationship with might just be a disappointment.

A lot of the reason behind this is because this college is so small. Is it really possible to find a soul mate on a campus the size of a Lego block? Absolutely. Is it easy? About as easy as climbing Mount Everest. Running into the same people every day doesn’t add up to the healthiest dating scene, and neither does the fact that people get recycled like aluminum cans.

Also, probably 35 percent of the students I know are in relationships with people at home (though this doesn’t stop some of our beloved Seahawks from creepin’ and playing the field anyway).

Then there’s the “Keep St. Mary’s Weird” factor. Though the ethnic diversity here is a little iffy, there is personality diversity. All the people that consider themselves “normal” are weary of dating someone that falls in the “weird” category.

Being weird isn’t a bad thing; it works for Carrot Top, Jack Black and Shrek (who also falls in the “ugly” category). But for some, it’s a deal breaker on this campus.

Alcohol is another dating kryptonite. A person can’t make connections with someone while that person is plastered to the point of singing Vanilla Ice songs. Drunken hook-ups and “What-happened-last-night’s” are a staple at this college, and most students I talked to feel that that’s as close to commitment as SMCM students like to get.

A few added that there are way more (sober) sexual relationships on this campus than meaningful, committed relationships; one student dared to say “Everybody’s banging everybody. It’s a complex spider’s web.”

I’m not saying it’s impossible to find someone. Sure, it’s hard because this campus is tiny, a lot of students are in relationships or virtually “undateable“, and liquor turns good prospects into drunken slobs.

But, I do know lucky people that have been in long-lasting relationships right up until Commencement Day. They can’t tell you what the secret to it is, though…because there isn’t one. I myself am happy in a relationship, but it took me three years and a lot of luck to get here.

To sum up: Dating at SMCM is like showing up at the MVA at 3pm. It’s frustrating and hopeless. If you want to try your luck, feel free. It might work out in your favor. But, just to be safe, keep your head in the books.

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